9/50 : The Job Hunt

In theory, I knew Japanese art history would be limited in terms of employment (at least in a related field). BUT I only need one  job so I don't need tons of openings. (Anyone who knows anything about probability will likely laugh at that statement, but I'm sticking with it.) Nevertheless, applications and rejections are discouraging. Granted I've spent more time abroad than at home since graduating on May 22, but sometimes we forget about facts and reality and get lost in our heads. I started painting this man, copying from a book of Japanese paintings. His smug expression didn't quite cut it so I moved on.

...and here's my attempt to practice brush strokes, washes, and vent those discouraged feelings:

The painting and photos are from before I left for Japan. I returned last week and am slowly recovering from serious jet lag BUT after many museum visits and discovering many Japanese painting stores in Tokyo, my love of painting is renewed and I can smile at this beast painting. I sketched more in two weeks there than I had in months combined! I come up with all sorts of excuses why I "can't" paint but behind it all is fear and pride:

"If I don't have the perfect conditions (rest, mental capacity, organization, space, cleanliness, materials) then I will not make the perfect painting, and since I can't bear to be less than perfect I will not try." How silly when it's spelled out like that!

The best way to do it, is to do it! ~Amelia Earhart

Just like reading through the Bible in Japanese from Genesis, I could spend ages strategizing the best plan but it's much more effective to just sit down and do it every morning. My dad calls me " a creature of habit." I  keep my Japanese Bible in the same spot on top of my recipe box. I make the same breakfast/coffee to accompany reading. I sit in the same chair, and open up where I left off the day before.  But at the same time my curiosity for new experiences is insatiable. Maybe the daily routine is like a foundation to jump off of to explore, learn, experience new things.

Now in the beginning of 1 Chronicles, the genealogies aren't as exciting to read through as were the stories of friendship and God speaking to his people, but the best way to read through is to read through so I have to keep chugging along. Same with painting! I'll make it a habit.

8/50 : Art, vocation, and a terrible painting

First, a brief update since I've been MIA for a month:

• graduated with a Master's in Art History (Japanese Art History emphasis)
• travelled to Thailand and Cambodia

Now I'm applying to jobs related to Japanese, writing, history, cultural exchange, and art... decisive as usual.

The point of writing about my painting is for exposure- to fight perfectionism. Sometimes, oftentimes, my paintings suck. After writing my thesis for grad school, I see how painting and writing are the same. As author E.B. White says, "A writer who waits for ideal conditions under which to work will die without putting a word on paper." So forget the migraine, the not-helpful single AC unit two rooms away (how dare I complain about having more than 1 room??), and anxiety about an interview on Friday. I'm not a creative genius. No one is, we have to work at it.  It feels like I've never held a brush or used this ink before but it'll get better. My hands will remember how to control the brush and ink.

Working with your hands, or working in general, must be  done with diligence and excellence: Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men (Col 3:23). In Art and the Bible, Francis Schaeffer expands on this and also writes on how to think about contemporary art:

“What is the place of art in the Christian life? Is art- especially the fine arts- simply a way to bring worldliness in through the back door? What about sculpture or drama, music or painting? Do these have any place in the Christian life? Shouldn't a Christian focus his gaze steadily on "religious things" alone and forget about art and culture? As evangelical Christians, we have tended to relegate art to the very fringe of life. The rest of human life we feel is more important. Despite our constant talk about the lordship of Christ, we have narrowed its scope to a very small area of reality. We have misunderstood the concept of the lordship of Christ over the whole man and the whole of the universe and have not taken to us the riches that the Bible gives us for ourselves, for our lives, and for our culture. The lordship of Christ over the whole of life means that there are no platonic areas in Christianity, no dichotomy or hierarchy between the body and the soul. God made the body as well as the soul, and redemption is for the whole man.”

While I say I no longer believe in the myth of the spontaneous creative genius, my actions suggest otherwise. So it was time to begin painting #2 of my series of 10 Nagasaki paintings. Since it has been over a month since painting and I'm down to my last precious piece of Arches watercolor paper, a practice sketch was necessary. When I practice freehand sketches, I always work from the top left to bottom right. Maybe it's because I'm a lefty. One look at the left and right side of this painting make it very clear what difference a few practice strokes can make:

Started at the top left with this sloppy cross:

Ended on the right, much different than the starting point:

Moral of the story: KEEP PAINTING.

The drafting table is now raised as a standing table (maybe hard to tell since my height doesn't change significantly from sitting to standing) which makes it much easier to paint!

1/50 : Paint and blog it, 50 times in 2015

Time for New Year's Resolutions 2015! [According to every personality test I'm an "Achiever" to put it lightly so I just can't help it.] First looking back, here are my 2014 resolutions written in pen in a notebook I started a year ago:

{BOLD: Resolution 2014 ------> Italic : Result 2014}

1. Read the Japanese Bible through -----> [only 1500 more pages to go]
2. Lift weights regularly----->[Yes]
3. Paint -----> [Twice, maybe]
4. Disciple/mentor relationship -----> [Yes]
5. Become a yogi -----> [Yes... but now recovering with a sore neck from falling directly on my head a few weeks ago]
6. Teach Page words in Japanese -----> [Somewhat]

Maybe the resolutions were too broad. Resolutions 2015 are for the most part related to last year. (Aside from my core identity and spiritual life) I've pinpointed things I love and am finally not embarrassed to admit them. I'll write more about how I see God's character through them in a later post.

• Painting
• Good food (all things related: to cook, experiment, & eat; cookbooks, menus, demos)
• Learning history (currently, specifically comparative studies between Buddhist and Catholic practice & Japanese Christian history)

There are other regular activities that I don't necessarily love, like exercise. I've wanted to be athletic but I would rather roll around and stretch until I can fold into a pretzel...for what purpose? I have no idea. I work out because I want to use what I'm given (health) to take care of my family as long as I am able. As much as I wish I loved exercise, I don't. But it's just like hundreds of other things that are necessary regardless of if they are fun or not.

Finally getting to the point...almost. I'll finish grad school in May, so the "what next" question comes up often. Answer, as photographed below:

• Short version-Paint and teach.
• Long version- Continue large scale ink painting series of Japanese Christian history, using and "translating" Western art compositions of parallel historical events. For teaching, if there are positions available, then teach Asian art history at local community colleges.

Resolutions 2015:

1. 50 paint-blog entries: practicing ink line work and "translating" Western art into Japanese style
2. Use Japanese daily at home
3. Memorize portions of Ephesians 3 and Colossians 3
4. Submit proposals for conferences and publications
5. Finish reading Japanese Old Testament
6. Continue yoga working toward a press-up handstand

There it is. After the long-winded explanation, this travel blog is reborn now as my 50 paint-blog entry resolution for 2015. Here is 1/50. I'm painting a photo I took in Sintra, Portugal this summer at Quinta de Regaleira. I'm still in love with old walls. (See http://emakubo.com/2011/02/13/more-from-italy/ and http://emakubo.com/2010/04/05/paintings-from-cortona/ )

I don't know why I chose to work on such a giant painting to "get back into it." Perhaps my "Achiever" personality?

Here's the painting in progress and a detail shot. Another aspect of this 50 blog post is to stop being a proud perfectionist by show imperfect things. I'm sure there will be "off" days for drawing but with this concrete goal I have to show it anyways!

...plus some photos of my most recent organized chaos of art supplies and research materials. Apologies for the darkness. I'm looking for how to light up the studio space more. Also I only had my 35mm lens around so please excuse the weird angles and cropping :)

 Coming next: Process/result of building a stretcher frame with my dad's help for a large oil painting I painted in Italy. We have a building date on Thursday. The neglected painting has been rolled up for 4.5 years!